Category Archives: Family

Contentment..a lovely feeling

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I have wondered from time to time what contentment would feel like?, you know its like trying to define your Utopia, or your idea of it. 

 

Being from one of middle class traditional hindu families, I have never celebrated festivals like Id or Christmas, not even socially have I got to celebrate these, as my circle of friends which was almost non existent did not celebrate them either. So holidays to these festivals was spent at  home doing nothing, or just doing the left out errands. This time Christmas was slightly different.

 

One of my cousins had come down to India, from the US. He is one of the people whom I have been very close to, he lived with us for about an year, and also as kids we have always bonded, over games and the innumerable fights we have had. Anyways, he had come down, and we decided to host a get together party for him and his wife at our house. It was supposed to be just our first relatives, all my father’s brothers and sisters and their families. With few people out on their annual vacation, the count had come down to around 20 of us. Me being a little too held up at work, was kind of not in the party mood.

 

People started trickling in from morning, even though the plan was to meet for lunch. Its fun talking to my uncles, and aunts, I have always loved my conversations with them, its always filled with laughter. There is something amazing about a loud laughter coming from old people, its like telling us whats wrong with you, when we after seeing so many ups and downs in life can laugh our hearts out, why can’t you young ones do it.  There is this is mystical feel to the laughter, when it is around people you care, you begin to get sucked into it. So the grumpy me kind of eased into the day, with chuckles and by mid day I was laughing out loud.

 

Food is always a big thing in our households, as most of us do enjoy eating. You can be eating a common dish, something you eat everyday, but you put some 20 laughing mouths in a hall, and feed them something even ordinary, it begins to taste heavenly. And when it comes to good food, in such an environment, the feeling you get is just truly unexplainable. So there I was eating an extra helping out of my plate, a dish which I generally do not prefer, feeling the taste on my tongue. As I was looking at people whom I have hated and loved at times, with kids around enjoying one of the odd occasions when they get to be pampered by us, lunch kind of just moved up a couple of notches in my view.

 

The evening too ended up being an open court, for hot topics, ranging from religions beliefs, to finance, to even gender bias and divide. Of course nowadays none of the discussions at my house can end without bringing up the topic of my marriage, or the idea of possible suggestions for a suitable bride. Anyways it so happened that this day, it kind of hardly bothered me.

 

At the end of that day, when I went to bed, I had a thought in my head, how amazing contentment feels like.

Rajasthan vacation tidbits #2

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Guys I am back to bore you with more vacation tidbits, this time its the two days which we spent in Udaipur following our two days at Jaipur. You can read the first part of the post “here

*We were supposed to leave Jaipur by around 8, I got up at my usual time of 6am, and discovered something, my stomach, excruciating pain that ran through my body, I rushed to the restroom, but all the eating I did at chowki Dani the last night had taken toll on me, and man it was bad. I skipped breakfast and just had couple of glasses of orange juice. Couple of trips to the restroom and few pills later, I was ready to leave Jaipur. The plan was to visit Chittorgarh, a big fort on the way to udaipur.

*One thing that strikes you during the journey from Jaipur to Udaipur is the road, the highway is just too good, huge 4 lanes on both the directions, and smooth with no path holes, we just cruised along in our innova, Just loved this aspect of the travel

*When we reached Chittorgarh, I was floored by the hugeness of the fort. The best part was that you could take a tour around the fort in your car, and this helped a lot especially with my bad tummy. The guide we took was extremely knowledgeable and well past his middle age, this meant that he spoke a LOT, he started with the history from loooooong ago and began telling us, we spent first 30 mnts learning when the fort was built, by whom, and when he moved out. The bad part was the scorching sun, and my bad tummy. The sun meant that along with tummy, now I had a bad headache, which made it impossible for me to stand at one place. You could easily spot a restless rambler hoping for the lecture to end. This has to be easily my worst day of the vacation.

*We moved along and checked the Rana Kumba palace, the meera temple, the vijay stumbh couple other places in the fort slowly, and tummy was a little better now, but the headache, and no lunch had made my condition worse.

*We finally reached a dhaba at 4pm, imagine me, and no food till 4 pm, just two glasses of juice, I was really miserable, all I wanted to do was sleep, so for the first time I just choose a bench slightly away from where others were sitting and ordering food, and just dozed off.

*food took a long time to arrive, and by then I was up, a plate full of curd rice is what I had, and was just hoping to reach udaipur.

*We reached Udaipur by 6:30PM and we didn’t have any plans for the day except boating, we learnt that boating gets closed by 6, so we were late. Our hotel person suggested a place called “Bagore Ki Haveli”, this is a place where they showcase all the traditional dances from across Rajasthan. The show was to begin at 7, so we quickly freshened up an got into the car. We reached the place by 7:10 and the show had already begun. We rushed in, and tried to find seats.

*Bagiore ki Haveli, is very different from normal places, its just an old haveli with a big courtyard, where they perform dances. They have put these carpets around the court yard where you are supposed to be seated, and they perform various dances in the middle. This was an surprise, we liked this a lot. The strange thing was that there were very few Indians at this place, and we were surrounded by huge number of non Indian travelers all enjoying the dance. The ticket price is just 30Rs, and this is very close to the Lake Pichola. The only drawback though are the dancers, most of them are really old :)

*After a nice hour spent at that place we came out to the main market which is close to the haveli, and started searching for a place to have dinner. That’s when someone suggested a pure vegetarian restaurant called “baba palace”, we went there and found out that they serve pure veg chicken biryani. Well we had been totally mislead. As we had already gone inside, we decided to order food. This was a roof top restaurant, so I decided to go up further to get the view from the watch tower. The view of the fully lit Udaipur palace was just amazing, this was a day before diwali, so the jagadish mandir too was well lit, the view was just too good.

* I met couple of people from Isreal while at the top, and we have good fun discussing Rajasthan as I tried to help them set up a make shift tripod for their SLR.

*We had a huge fight with the management at the hotel as they took almost 90 minutes to deliver our order, all of us lost our cool, and infact my aunt barged into their kitchen to check if they were really cooking our order.

*I woke up early next day to take a walk around the place we were staying. We stayed very close to Fateh Sagar Lake, so I wanted to have a early morning view. I went to the terrace of our hotel, to get the gorgeous view of the sunrise and also the garden surrounding the lake, A morning totally well spent.

*This was supposed to be a busy day, as we were supposed to do sight seeing all day, we went to the Udaipur palace which is a very good spectacle, we also saw the jagdish temple and garden of fountains called “Sahelioyon ki bhari” which was a waste of time, and then we went to shilpagram which is like a place where they exhibit and sell Rajathani art and handicrafts. It too turned out to be not so good.

*We had a great great lunch, gujrati thali at restaurant called “natraj”, god bless the owner. Just loved the food there.

*I forgot to mention that this day, was the diwali day, and we could hear firecrackers bursting all around. Our driver wanted to take the evening off and celebrate diwali. All he had to do was ask that in a straight forward manner, instead he kept beating around the bush, saying we couldn’t do anything in the evening and stuff like that. People around me kept pushing him to take us do the boating, he reluctantly agreed, we found out that the boating is just till 5, and he had mislead us that it is till 6, so there went our plan. He was supposed to pick us up from the central place, but he gave some excuse and we had to take a rickshaw.

*I got the best ride of my life here. As its diwali time there were no rickshaws at all and all we could find was one three wheeler. 9 of us, including the rickshaw driver all got into that small automobile and reached our hotel. I cant believe 9 of us fit into that.

*The driver was still not spared as all people with me wanted to go to the same place for dinner. I was so embarrassed, all I wanted was just to let him go, poor guy wanted to celebrate diwali. I was just sick of the people

finally we ended the Diwali day at Udaipur, with all of us taking a sound sleep. 

more tidbits to follow…

Rajasthan vacation tidbits #1

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Guys I am back, I came back on Monday and have been a bit busy after coming back. I did go around the blog world reading things I missed over the last ten days, and here I am today sharing some of the tidbits, few thoughts that sprang in my mind during my vacation. I promise there will be more to follow.

*Indian railways has changed so much over the years, I remember the old days when we used to travel to Rajkot/Ahmedabad, the problems we used to have during the journey, the dirty toilets we had to put up with and the filthy seats/berths in the coaches. What surprised me most during this journey, was the outlook of the people which has changed, long time back I used to find people playing cards, gossiping, reading newspapers or simply eating through to their destination. Look what the IT world has bought, I see people watching movies on laptops and Ipods now, I see people playing solitaire on their ipods, portable DVD players, I hear mobile phone ringtones every few seconds. Cleanliness too has improved a lot, stations have been designated as cleaning stations, where people wearing jump suits wait for the train to come to a standstill, they bring on automated cleaners to clean toilets and wash basins, and even mops every now and then inside the coaches. Food is delivered on demand to the travelers, all packed in aluminum foils and disposable trays.

*Even though I spent most of my journey time playing cards with my family and cousins, [almost at one point I had won 270Rs], the best part of the journey was the 20 minutes I spent alone sitting on the steps of the coach, with the door open and wind running onto the face, man that bought some clarity to my mind, and a great deal of satisfaction.

*It appears that no recent train journeys seem to pass without my encounter with a female, remember this?, this one too had its fair share. My gaze seem to catch more women these days, I saw this shy female in our coach, sitting a little far from my place, you know the kind of instant attraction, great choice of color for dressing, the right amount of smile, and a book in hand. Sad I am a coward, didn’t even walk up to her and ask her name.

*Another thing which annoys me on almost every single journey of mine, is a crying baby near my seat. I mean I have traveled on air, on water, on road, everywhere I get stuck with a crying baby which annoys the hell out of me. This time for a change there was none on the first day and a half part of my journey, just when I thought the spell is broken, I see a lady coming in with a small kid, there went my night’s sleep. Whats this with crying babies and me.

*As we landed in Jaipur and entered our hotel, one thing that struck all of us was the way rooms were organized, we had a common living room into which all three rooms opened up into and a small kitchen to tag along, almost like a service apartment. We had booked three rooms, so no one else could come into the living room, we had it all for ourselves, it had a nice sitting place with couches all around, and antique furniture around, we just loved the place. All of us used the room just to sleep and use the bathroom, rest of the time you could find us sitting on the couch talking and laughing. God!, all of us loved the place.

*First place we visited in Jaipur, was the Birla Laksmi Narayan temple, a beautiful structure all built up in marble, the day was extremely hot, and we were asked to remove our shoes, prepared to perform the brake dance through hot sun, we stepped onto the temple premises, what a surprise it was, cold slabs of marble even in that hot sun. A lovely experience.

*City palace and Jantar Mantar were really tiring, long hours spent walking up and down the palace, the museum and lot of other places, The astronomical tools in Jantar Mantar are mind boggling. The rajasthani mataka kulfi sold all around was a pleasant relief in that high temperature.

*Evening was spent shopping in Johri Bazaar, walking through highly crowded Diwali shoppers, all I could see were glittering dresses, and handicrafts. I found the LMB a mishtan place, supposedly a very famous sweet shop in Jaipur, well that was fun. I did buy a pair of Jodhpuri shoes made of camel skin, which I later found out was fake and each shoe of the pair looks of different color. All in all a tiring day.

*Next day started with a heavy breakfast buffet, a couple of boiled eggs, alu parathas, and toasts. My mom could not believe how much I could eat. She hardly gets to see me eat that way at home

*Amer fort and Jaigarh fort were to be our main destinations of the day, and man they were huge. The best part is how clean they have maintained the fort, and views it has to offer. The royalty of the place is clearly visible. I chose not to ride elephants, nor camels en-route.

*For the first time in India I got to see use of Radio guides in these forts, I was impressed, so I went and rented one for myself. The rest of the gang chose to opt for the usual human guide. Radio guide meant that I was stuck long behind the rest of the gang as I wandered the palace alone, that was real fun. You know the laid back kind of stroll, listening to the history of the place. But one thing though, radio guide was a real flop in places because, the numbers are so difficult to find, you end up searching a lot, and getting frustrated at the end. The directions need to be made more clear, and the path to follow from one place to another as the fort is huge.

*As I said earlier I chose not to ride the elephant, some people in the gang wanted to do that, so they decided to ride upto the fort once again, as I along with few others waited at the foot hills of the hillock. As we were waiting, we chose to go visit a small garden which was being built near the foot hills, glad we did that. The place was very beautiful and view of the fort from the garden was excellent. I also got to see the new marble fountains being installed there.

* Lunch followed the visit to Jaigarh fort, in a local restaurant. This has to be top two worst meals I have had in the trip, the taste was bad, and was extremely filthy place. The fact that I overheard a customer complaining that the roti’s were being prepared close to the toilets, made me feel even worse about the place, a forgettable experience.

*Last evening in Jaipur was spent in Chowki Dhani, a resort of types which offers a close look into the rajasthani traditions, a little expensive by general standards, but I think it was worth the money. Arts and handicrafts, A local mela kind of atmosphere, and the authentic rajasthani speaking people around. The jewel in the crown was the dinner we had there, filled with all Rajasthani delicacies, mani types of rotis made out of local cereals, sabji’s made out of things which I cannot name, Dal bhati and choorma made out of pure ghee, the Malpoa a superb sweet dish, and lots and lots more. I ate so much that my stomach got hit with indigestion the next day.

more tidbits to follow……………….

Yours, Mine and Ours

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Last week there was an article about sharing money in a relationship, you know being able to take money from your partner, or parents. About how people like to be able to be independent and not want any financial support from the close ones. It spoke more gender biased, more from the female perspective, borrowing money from husband/father. I remember writing something on the subject a long time back under “Random realizations” here .

Ever since I read this thing, the topic has been on my mind, with stray thoughts developing around the subject. 

It should be cool to borrow right?

I figured it should feel lovely to be able to have another source of income right, why would I feel shy to ask my woman, money?, as long as I am aware I am not wasting the money, and I am gonna use it for good of myself or my family, whats wrong with asking money from my partner?. I guess I would choose to ask her first before going to my dad. I mean it should be ok to go back to my father If I am in real need of the money, and I would expect him to come to me when he needs some as well. It feels really great to have a feeling that someone is there to get your back when you need something, I guess be it your woman or your father really does not matter much. 

Is ego the factor?

There must be a factor which prevents us from going to our loved ones when in trouble, especially when it comes to finance. What makes us think less of us?, is it ego?. Its not entirely true, by that I mean its not entirely false :). Its really a bit of ego, when we hesitate to go to a partner and borrow money, its like when you go out to dinner, its expected for a man to pay. Coming to that I think this should change, in an equal relationship, why not let the woman pay once in a while?, why not ask her to take care of the bill?. Is there a sense of loss when one asks his/her partner to pay?, may be for the dinner or for something else?. Because if there is, there must be something wrong, because this isn’t a game, or a sport where there is a winner, or a loser. Is ego a big blocker even in case of relation with the parent?.  I guess yes, a fear of looking incapable, or not being able to support oneself in front of your parent can be ego hurting to many people, may be the notion of borrowing money being an indication of incapability itself is the biggest cause for ego issues between partners and parents.

Can time be the change factor?

In a relationship, if you are still not comfortable with sharing your financial troubles, what do you think would make you change your mind, is it something like you would never change?, or may be it takes time to change your mindset?. Can time instrument a change in your stance regarding being able to accept money from your partner?. I think with time the level of comfort would increase with the partner, and one would more open, and with lesser ego/fear to borrow money. Again it depends a lot on the person and the relationship, some couple might take forever to be able to reach this stage, and some might reach this during the courtship before marriage itself. It also depends on the person, how strong his repulsion towards sharing finance is.

What about repaying?.

I really have a hypocrite view on this matter, I had a strong feeling that I need to pay back money if I borrow it from my father, but do not have that strong a feeling when it comes to returning it to my partner. In case of father, firstly he would be retired, so its my responsibility to make sure he does not face any financial problem, and also somewhere the idea of being a team is not so strong when it comes to father/parents. You do have a strong feeling of being on your own. With the partner it is different, I feel more of a team, and I have a feeling I might not be so keen of repaying, may be I would in a different manner, but the idea of borrowing money from the partner as a loan does not appeal to me, I think it should never be that way, if it is, then I guess the idea of sharing does not come in at all.  

That thought makes me move onto the next big question, should couples keep track of money flow between themselves?

I guess people should really keep track of where their money is going, you know keep a check on the outflow, and areas of outflow, but would you keep track that my partner borrowed 1000Rs for that nice shoes in the mall, or she bought my ticket for the movie?. I am really clueless on this topic, may be I would know better when I am actually in that role.

What say you people?

Ooops I did it again…. Heads or Tails #46

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I generally go grocery shopping with my dad, well surprising to many because I am this lazy guy who hates to get out of the house, but when it comes to shopping for groceries I am always game. I kind of like checking out the new stuff in the market. In an effort to ape the west, our local grocery stores too have become trendy, with aisles together of unwanted stuff to buy, but then I am not complaining,  I generally like browsing these aisles, and my dad is the strict shopper types, who makes the list of things and then goes directly to the isles where we find them.
So usually you can spot us in different isles, me checking out the prices of the new stuff and my dad doing some serious shopping, but then I also have this habit of talking when I browse the aisles, I use the shopping time to make the real conversations with my dad, something serious to discuss, or something which I can’t talk to him at house in front of my mother, or some serious stuff we need to discuss. Just the other day I was talking to him about my investment plans, a real animated and passionate conversation and I turn around and see my dad is not at all there, I am talking to the air. My dad has gone to some other isle, and I am like this idiot talking to myself. I went, oops I did it again..

This is one of the many occasions where I have been caught talking in the air, there have been so many times me and my cousin from here, are doing some serious mall hopping, and we would be walking up the escalator, or down the aisles of a book or a clothes shoppe, and he stops to check out something, and me without realizing that, continue to talk my heart out. After absence of response for couple of minutes, I would go “oops” in my head, even without turning back, I would be so sure he wouldn’t be there.

I have almost got used to this kind of Oops moments, but the once I am more awkward about are those involving mistaken identities. I have a strong affinity towards colors, I mean I generally remember what people who are with me are wearing that day, so kind of approach people based on the apparel color, and being in haste as I always am, I end up walking upto them and continue what I want to say without checking if they are really my people, and there have been numerous accounts when they have turned around and I have felt oops .

So next time you see me talking to the air, or talking to you even though you don’t know me, then please do read the expression on my face which would read something like “OOPS

The topic over at skittles today is, any word which starts with “O” and I choose Oops

Zemanta Pixie

A weekend at rambler’s household

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Here’s a typical Saturday evening at Rambler household in chapters.

Poor old rambler, [hmm let me correct not so old rambler], in his room trying to alternate between the TV and his laptop, and also trying to throw in couple of pages of the book he has been reading.

Trrrrrrrrr…the door bell rings

Rambler to himself.
Oh not now, the book was getting interesting, why did they have to come now

Rambler’s mom from the kitchen, “Rambler! Open the door

Rambler sulking-ly walks up to the door and opens it.

Two people, whom Rambler has hardly spoken to, but can recognize from face and damn his good memory, can remember their names as well. Rambler as usual has his fake smile and let the people in.

As always, the two people start. “Oh you are home!. didn’t think you would be, its been so long since we saw you, last time we were here, you weren’t home.”

*Rambler thinking, Oh no!, dad’s not at home, this means I need to sit in the leaving room till these people leave, and not only that I need to try and strike a conversation too*

Rambler trying to be nice, “How are you people [Chhannagi idira], when did you come last time, I am generally home.

We had been here last <weeday>, you were not home”

Rambler Thinking *whose home on weekdays, don’t you know that there is something called work????*

Chapter 1 :Introduction
Picking up the conversation the couple would start “Oh you have grown so much, we almost could not recognize you, it must be years now. You look so much like X now.”
[You can substitute X here as follows, if couple is from my mom’s side, I would appear to them as if I am so much like my mom, or her brothers, if X is a relative of my dad’s, I am a carbon copy of either my dad, or his brothers], If I ended being like every one I am supposed to be like, I would have ended up like a family album of portraits, and all morphed together into one face.

Rambler settles slightly into the seat, when mom has to rush to kitchen to prepare coffee or tea.

Now this is the worst part of the whole scene, the couple obligated to speak to me, with not knowing what to talk about, and me trying hard not to be alone in the room. So the couple begin

Chapter 2: work [used to be education till very recently]

Alternate1:
So Where do you work?.

Rambler, trying to be as inaudible as possible, “M*”!

Oh, You should have tried in Wipro/Infosys, with your marks and talent you would have got in for sure.

Rambler not knowing how to react, *yeah may be, may be I should jump there next time*.

Oh yeah you software guys never stick to one job, we people served a single company all our lives.

Alternate2: [slightly hep couples]

So are you still with M?

Rambler:Oh yes,

Oh really?, we thought you would have switched companies

As though it’s a crime to stay with the same company for that long, you are a software engineer, than you should behave like you are unfaithful husband and your company is you’re an year old wife, you got to stray now, this is the time

Chapter 3: Weekend

The focus shifts to their almost shocking discovery that I am home on a weekend

Alternate1:
So, why are you home, not going out with friends?

Rambler thinking, didn’t you complain just now that you are not home on weekdays..

Yeah, I prefer to stay at home on weekends

Oh my son/daughter never stays home on weekends, they never take rest

Rambler thinking, when would we stop complaining ? ..oh wait am I not complaining too

Alternate2:
So, why are you home, not going out with friends?
Rambler: “Yeah, I prefer to stay at home on weekends

Oh you should not stay home, you should go out, make new friends, may be visit some relatives

Rambler thinking, somehow they want me to get out of my own house, phew

Chapter Marriage;

Couple turning to my mom, who is now in the room serving coffee.

When are you getting rambler married, he looks old enough, shall we spread the word around

My mom, getting the much needed support which she otherwise wouldn’t
You guys only ask him, he never listens to me, we are ready

Rambler thinking, oh not again.

What are you waiting for?, good job and all settled, you should not delay, its tough to find girls later.

Rambler trying to not sound harsh. “No another year or two maybe

Alternate1:
Couple becoming all excited trying to help rambler out “So tell me, if you have found a girl friend already, we will make sure your parents get you married to her only?

Alternate2:
Nowadays people have no respect for religion, specially girls always trying to trap good boys like you..

Rambler thinking,, trap aha that would be fun, may be I should carry protection from now on, just in case.

Rambler mumbling out: No, nothing like that, no girl friends

Oh we knew that, you are a very good boy. As if they know what I am doing everyday.

I have never been ashamed of being a “good boy” until now.

Chapter 4: Good bye

We should be going back now..

So Rambler, why don’t you come home, my son/daughter have not seen you from such a long time

As If I am some celebrity who their children are waiting to see

You should make some time and come for lunch

Rambler trying to smile, and let them guess the answer as Yes/No whatever they feel like

And that’s an end of yet another weekend story at Rambler’s

The weekend that was – Heads or Tails #36

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Skittles has an interesting topic for this week’s Heads or Tails. She wants us to share a fond memory. I could’ve brought something out of the my 26 year old memory bank, but I chose to bring out a very recent memory, something as recent as this weekend.

This weekend I took a break from my routine work and decided to take a small weekend vacation with my my parents, my cousin and his family, and my aunt’s family. It began with a plan to spend the weekend at a resort, only to find out they were all booked, we didn’t want to cancel, so decided to spend the weekend at my aunt’s place instead. However we just stopped over on the way to Mysore, to see if there were any last minute cancellation at the resort we wanted to stay, and to our surprise we found what we were looking for. We booked for a single night stay for Saturday, and we negotiated a good deal from Saturday morning till Sunday late afternoon. What followed was a string of sweet memories.

  • Nostalgia from years down the line spent in Mysore with my two cousins, the times we have had fun, places visited and pranks relived, fun remembered. Sometimes it fun just reliving the moments from the past
  • An Aunt’s special dinner, with a delicacy which she prepared the best, I have to admit I ate a little too much
  • A place which is very small, and has an almost unnoticeable grandeur, well I am not talking about the famous Mysore palace, but a place called “Mylari hotel”, famous for their amazingly soft Masala Dosa. Saturday morning spent over a sooper cool breakfast.
  • Being greeted by some Bikini clad people at the resort by the pool [well I am naughty sometimes :)]
  • An hour spent along the river kaveri, trying to help my 6 year old niece catch a fish.
  • Hours spent lazing in the pool, without knowing how to swim, and almost blind without my specs, with my niece and my cousins.
  • Playing cards with the family till 1 am filled with roars of laughters and lots of fun.
  • Sleeping till 9:30 in the morning to be woken by a bored niece
  • A trip to a local hillock and a very calm temple, walking bare foot in a scorching sun.
  • A long enacting of a being a wild flower, with a lot of swaying and hushing noise as well, my niece is playing a flower in her summer camp’s play. So we got a demo of her play as well as the dance she is gonna perform.
  • A post lunch card game to wrap up a lovely weekend spent, with a lot of fond memories to carry away from.

It happened…

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Let me start by saying, I get embarrassed very quickly. I have had numerable instances where I have been embarrassed because of people around me. I think main reason for this is the high standards I set for myself, and how strongly opinionated I am about things. When you believe in something very passionately, you kind of feel violated when someone behaves totally opposite to what you believe in.

You guys do know how much I am particular about time. When I invite someone out, or when I have planned a meeting or so, and the person is late, I get furious, but still I kind of leave some margin of tolerance mainly because its me who invited them, may be they did not anticipate an unexpected event. But when somebody else invites me, and they are late, my blood pressure generally hits double century. How can one be late for an event planned by themselves. It happened on Monday night, I was invited for a dinner outside and was asked to be ready by 8:30PM, I kind of thought its too late, well I do prefer to be at home by 10PM,  anyways I got ready by 8:20 and was waiting, I did not even get a call till 8:50, and I was told they will be there in another 5 minutes, and even after that they took fifteen minutes to come home, so its was already 9:05. Now I had lost the little mood I had to go have dinner, but because of the earlier commitment I got my lazy ass into the car.

Now let me tell you with whom I was going out. I was supposed to go out with a  couple of cousins, when I say couple I mean literally “couple”, my cousin and his wife. I am close to both of them, so she has automatically turned into my cousin. Anyways I generally avoid going to hep places, places which has young and modern crowd when I am with my family. I hate to use the term “modern”, but then that’s what my family does to me, I mean any tight jean clad lady, with a drink in hand is ultra modern to my family. So I avoid going to hep places mainly because, I don’t like to listen to some comments about the crowd which I am sure would disturb me, and make me feel out of place, and embarrassed. My cousin wanted to have something Italian, and as It was already late, only place I could think off was Casa Picola which has opened recently very near to my house. Its not that hep a place, so I thought this would be safe. When I got into the car, I had a surprise, there was one more relative of ours in the car, he is almost my cousin’s age, so he had been pulled along. We had not gone out as a group much, so did not know what to expect from him.

We arrived at  the place, and it turned out be a lounge bar attached to the Italian place. I really liked the place, totally my kind of ambiance, pale colors, very few people around, very comfortable sofa’s and even bean bags around, we chose to be seated on the terrace as the interior place was very hot. As we reached the terrace, I saw that the crowd was very young, a little dimly lit [which I don’t like], and almost all of them looked like pretty cool and minding their own business types. I was happy to see that, even with many people around it was quiet and all in all I was very happy to discover the place.

We got seated, me and the other guy at one side of the table, and my cousin and his wife on the other side. From where we were sitting I could see a couple of women, [not sure may be girls :) ] sitting across the table, the girl kind of looked good, and I was back into my discussion about who is going to drink what. That’s when the guy began, he had a problem with the girl smoking, he was cribbing that she hasn’t kept down the pack ever since we entered, and how can she do that. Mind you he was a smoker as well, he had the cigarette almost all the time we were there, and still he complains, and the worst part was he kept staring at the two women. I did see her a little annoyed with him staring at her, and once in a while the other two turning back and watching them. I was so embarrassed, I wanted to walk upto them and apologize, If only I had better socializing skills.

Anyways then it came to ordering stuff, now that all three of them were having fosters, and me with  my new found sober year for 2008 had ordered a mocktail. We were supposed to order some appetizers, and I picked out few and decided what we may want to order, and when the waiter came to take the order, I told him what we want, and when the waiter was just about to go, this guys screams at him “Hello!”…”do you have any egg item, something like a egg burgee or a egg omelet”, almost every one at the less crowded places turned towards us, I just wanted to get up and run away.

He continues to stare at the two girls, and couple of other pretty girls who had by now come into the restaurant. How can a married guy stare so much?, just because his wife is not around does it mean, go and visually abuse any girl around?, and that too when we have a girl in our group as well.

Anyways, its time to order main course, and by now I just wanted it to get over as soon as possible, so I ask them well in advance, since most of the Italian stuff is bland, what they want to eat, do they want the spicy one, or they want to try the authentic blander versions. And they all agree to go for the blander one, I knew they are not gonna like it, so I suggest some not so bland ones, and for myself I order a dish named “epinard al a crème”, it’s a potato and spinach baked dish. When the dish comes onto the table, they are more intrigued by what I have ordered, and want to grab a bite, which I oblige easily. Worst part was to follow, after just 2 bottles of beer, this guy begins to burp as loudly as a loud speaker, and every 5 minutes, I don’t know how much gas he had in him, he eats a spoon and burps out a big on ‘brrrrrrrroh”, and I am furious at his ill manners, how can you burp so loudly in a restaurant like this, atleast you are supposed to keep the sound down, but no, it appeared as if he wanted everyone to know the strength in his vocal chords.

I was waiting for the check to arrive, so that we can pay and leave. I can’t remember any other time I have been embarrassed this much. I wish those two girls should have walked up to our table, and given us a mouthful.

Retro thoughts..

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Thinking Aloud who writes at Aalochane has tagged me with a meme, which is about recollecting thoughts from the past, Trying to recollect the posts you have written and reliving some of the thoughts related to family, friendship, yourself, and your love.

I think I had seen this meme on one of the blogs before, and I had liked it instantly, mainly because its more about reliving those moments when you wrote those posts. So for a change I chose to do the meme on the same day as I am tagged :).

For the readers, here are the rules
Post links to 5 of your previously written posts. The posts have to relate to the 5 key words given : family, friend, yourself, your love, anything you like. Tag 5 other friends to do this meme. Try to tag at least 2 new acquaintances so that you get to know them each a little bit better.

Here they go …

Family.. I think one of the things which should be and will be in all of our minds is family, actually I was searching through my older posts, and I never thought I would not find posts related to family in there.
I remember this post which I had written about parenting, I am not a parent, but it doesn’t stop us thinking like one, does it?, heres “parenting blues from a non parent.“.
There are times when I totally feel a disconnect from my family, and its followed by a realization and getting back into the family groove, one of those times over here at “family lost and found“.

Friends…
I have had very less number of friends over years, but the ones I have, have been really close.
There have been times when I have wondered where it all starts, like here “lets talk about beginnings“.
There have been times when I have wondered about how friendships have been under confusions over years when gender is involved, “friendship talkies.

Yourself…
Looks like all posts I write, somehow relate to this topic in a way or other :). I wish I could put all the links here..
I have some real strong attachment to this thought, mainly because this is the first time I wanted to write something. This is the first time I documented the thought that was going through me. Here it is “Inspired by the 2 way
I have written for prompts over time, and one of the posts which I really liked was about writing letters, I think this was something which I felt for “Times when I wanted to write a letter
I have never shied from admitting I tend to be over sensitive, and there were times when I have thought more about the topic like here “I am talking sensitivity today”

Your love..
I am really apprehensive when it comes to this topic, mainly because I feel my brand of romance or love is something not the typical types, or may be not even something that can be considered as love.
I once spoke about the music of silence between people here at “Silent strings“.
There have been times when I have been expressive, about how I see ‘her’, what I want ‘her’ to be like, for example here at “she“.
My ideas of sharing romance with a partner was once upon a time expressed over here at “bed share story“.

Somehow did not find the 5th topic on TA’s blog, so went ahead and chose something which always finds mention on my blog.
Relationships…
I once wrote about equations, and I was really impressed with the title I chose..”x2 + y2 = z2

I am supposed to tag 5 people, but I am really bad at this, so I think I am gonna bail out on this one :).

Random Randomness #6/08

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Random Thoughts:
Recently I read a comment “here“, even though I thought the whole post was with a sense of humor, my eyes did catch a comment which said about about being tongue tied when guys approach a thinking woman. Lets forget about the distinction of being a thinking women, and take women in general, how many of the men really approach a woman and talk freely. I guess there is a lot of difference with boy approaching a girl, and a man approaching a woman. I have seen and have myself been at one point of life in the category where the shyness in approaching a person of opposite sex was very high. I think somewhere we grow out of it, may be that is called maturity, or may be we just grow up. Coming back to the comment about thinking man/woman, I do not think there is anyone who does not think, may be the topics we think about may vary, and also our sensibilities.

Random update:
Driving classes, I have finally started ticking of things I planned to do in next two years. I started my driving classes last week. Waking up early was never an issue for me, but it had been quite a while since I got scoldings from some one, when my driving instructor scolds me early in the morning sometimes, I feel like being in my primary school, where my teacher used to scold me for not doing my work properly. It is almost the same environment as before,where I do some silly mistakes and the instructor is all set to pounce on me. Its still all in fun :)

Random Reality:
Last week has been really taxing mentally, I had a feeling of an unknown urgency, an unknown mental blockage, I was not able to think for most of the week. It all changed on Friday, as I reached home a little early, there was a big power cut, for about two hours, I had nothing to do, I was laying on the bed, that cleared my anxiety very much. I began to think again properly, and for a change, the unscheduled power cut in my locality had a great soothing effect on me. Well I did receive some comments about writing block on my post of Thursday, more than the writier’s block, it was my mental blockage which was making me very anxious, I am glad to be out of it

Random changes:
For starters I hate to change my routine life, more importantly I hate to change things associated with me. It took almost more than 2 years for my cousin to make throw out my old outdated mobile. I guess I am guilty of attaching too many memories to things. This week I finally am going to move onto a different number, I mean I am changing my network provider, it had been Hutch from last 5 years, and the same mobile number for as long as I can remember. Finally they have lost my loyalty and me my number. Not that many people call me on my mobile.. still its something which I brought with my first earned salary, even though I lost the instrument the number had a lot of memories associated with it.

Random Nostalgia:
Speaking of mobile phones, and memories, the week had a lot of nostalgia associated with it. Somehow I was ending up remembering many people and incidents from the past, not just the incidents even the movies I saw, kind of had memories associated with it. The week had some interesting movies being shown early in the morning in one of the channels, just in time of my breakfast when I get to have 20 mnts of TV time. Why do we do this, why do we associate memories with things around us. Its not just a movie, its the people who have watched with, the state of mind I was in when i watched the movie.
BTW, that reminds me, Its been quite sometime since I watched “Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind”.. should catch it on DVD

Random quotes:
This was an interesting observation made my fellow blogger shefaly on one of my posts extremes. “Rambler: Have you considered an academic career? I notice you notice things (empirical data) and then try and identify a pattern (define algorithm or propose hypothesis) around them. And of course, from what we know, you are not married so this discussion is purely academic, no? ;-)
Actually this kind of surprised me, she might have just joked about this, but does Rambler really do this?, hypothesize a lot on available data and experiences?..