I have never felt aimless ever in my life, until now that is. I never had to think about developing an aim, it has been obvious all the time. Forgetting the initial few years, where I could hardly think on my own, the goals and aims have just been drafted into my life. Its so ironic, when I could think on my own, I need not have to, the norm took over.
Education and carrier has been a goal for years now, for every individual, I guess carrier is a wrong choice of a word, its more like Job sounds a better option. How many of us aimed at carrier, all we wanted was a well paying job, at the same time something we enjoyed. Not many of us are Einsteins, nor many of us think that big. May be we were plagued by the middle class complacency. Looking at your parents struggle, you can hardly think beyond a comfortable life. Hardly can we aim at being the new Dhiru Bhai Ambani. All we need was a well paid job, to keep ourself happy.
After almost 5 years of life in such a job, what next?, the question haunts me a lot. What next?, what should I aim at. Growing inside the company itself, does not excite me much. I do my job decently well, and promotions and raise does excite me a little, but somehow that is not my aim, not even my goal nowadays. So what is it that others of my age are aiming. A married life?, Love?, relationships?, sex? unfortunately none of them are exciting me, nope not even sex. I know these are eventually gonna happen. Nothing which generates that extreme passion, which can make it a challenge.
I always wonder, I must not be the only one in this dilemma, there must so many mid twenties people around me, atleast some of them must be stuck with this aimlessness. What do they think?, what do they want. Just trying to find the clue.
This aimlessness has started to affect my thinking nowadays, I want to break free, I want to work on something, well apart from my job I mean. Some of my friends have explored the options of NGO’s. To be frank, that has never excited me, no I have concerns and all, but somehow thats not my idea of an aim.