Overheard at cafe


Scene: A table of for four at my workplace cafeteria.

People Involved:
Yours truly: sitting at the end of the table [usual preference]
A good friend: My coworker, good friend and a lunch buddy.
Guy1 [Lets call him Tom]: A reasonable young guy, looks like just out of college, may be an year of work experience max.
Guy2 [Lets call him Dick]: A guy in his mid twenties, neither too young, nor to old confused age I guess.
Guy3 [Lets call him Harry]: A late twenties guy, looks like a north Indian, and speaks like one.

And the fun began.
Me and my friend hurriedly walked into the café, I had been the culprit delaying lunch by about half an hour, you know the usual work pressures. So we walk up to surprisingly empty table in our busy café, and comfortably seat ourselves in the remote end. Somehow I have developed liking for the corner seats and tend to choose the ones in the far most table. As usual we opened our lunch boxes [yep we are fortunate ones who get lunch from home], and began with usual discussion about the project, and whos doing what badly, the usual suspicions as to whats gonna happen to our company, and throwing in the subject of movies once in a while.
Tom and Dick, seeing the empty place walk up to the table and make them comfortable, conversing with each other in hindi, and then a third guy Harry walks in and squeezes himself in between the other two.

Tom [to Dick]: Look Harry looks so concerned, he has began the hunt you know, now he is all tensed..

Tom [to Harry]: hey don’t worry too much about this, Dick can help you with this, btw you should decide on your specs first …

[Read it as, got to decide the specifications, the term used in the cubeland to indicate the requirements for any product/software]

Dick: Yeah you should first find out what you want, just “homely” is not good enough to find what you want.
Dick: I think you should go for a north Indian girl, South Indians are very forward.

*me thinks, Dick must have watched Chak De on Sony last week, talking about forwards..*

Dick Continues… South Indian girls are really well educated, earning well, and also mostly employed in a high paying corporate job. They are self sufficient and know they can live independently.

*me thinks Ah!, Ideal for me, but why “South Indians” and I look up to my friend who can’t stop smiling*

Dick Continues…Now a days you know girls directly ask, do you know basic cooking in the first meeting itself, so its better to employee a cook than marry one.

*me thinks ok at least he thinks wives are not mere cooks*

Harry: Surprised and a little worried by now, oh really? So we should know how to cook?

Dick: yep all IT couples in Bangalore, share the cooking job, if the guy reaches home early he will cut the vegetables by the time wife reaches home, and wife fine tunes them before cooking them

*me thinks, another tech word, fine tuning..job terms in conversations like this make them hilarious.. wow this guy is funny.. but good he wants to help his wife.*

Dick: That’s why you should marry a north Indian girl.. They are excellent managers you know, they take care of both work and home easily, you need not worry a bit.

*me thinks, so here comes the true color*
Tom [who was listening silently so far ], yeah that is the reason why I said, “You should decide on the specs”.

Dick [citing an example], you know my friend was telling this case, one girl who was exactly of the type we want, put up her profile on a matrimony site, and within a week there was a line, so such girls are totally out of reach

Tom: May be you should put up your profile too, some or the other will match your config spec

[Read config spec as the set of rules we define in the clear case to chose a particular version of the file in the vob]

*me thinks this was the limit, config spec hahha I need a break*

My friend was done, so we walked off before I could hear any more c**p

12 responses »

  1. Thanks for the peek into the Indian male mind. **grinning** I’m sure we American girls are way too forward for Dick. On the other hand, both myself & Poor Hubby just assumed the housework & cooking would be done by me & the home repairs & yard care & such would be the manly Hubby’s responsibility. Some things just don’t change over time & culture, I guess. 🙂

    Autumn..you know “forward” in Indian terminology is totally different than what Dick things, I personally feel its just the mindset of Indian men or people in general which needs to move forward.

  2. 🙂 rotfl at specs and fine tuning of the vegetables…seems like ur office has some entertaining specimens from the male of the species of homosapiens.

    If I keep my ears open every day I do not need any more entertainment than my workplace 🙂
    and we also do have the female species..its just that I don’t choose to talk about some really disgusting instances 🙂

  3. I like this stage of life…..when you gonna choose your life partner. I love that the excitement that is there. I was not knowing boys think these things about north and south indian girls. Good to know this. A lot have changed these days. You can’t make up your dreams by seeing typical hindi oldies. Great going……..I think it will be a good business to make guys to learn cooking! 🙂

    I am struggling to make sure I am not pushed into that phaze :), for people like me how love eating, it will be foolish not to learn how to cook..

  4. haha
    So the BRS is decided in this manner!
    And here I was wondering why I wasn’t getting anyone in line? Maybe it’s because I do fulfill all those South Indian qualities! 😛
    Totally loved the IT jargon in this conversation! 😀

    CR, may be you have been lucky so far 🙂
    oh me too..just we walked off the table, and laughed heartily all along the walk

  5. Pha!!! so typical!!! i’ve met so many such specimens here. Delhi is filled with such guyz!!!
    btw.. loved the fine tuning of vegetables line.. future matrimonial ads.. will hv all these lingo :))

    oh you can find the species everywhere 🙂

  6. So he shud first set the parameters… and then the values for them.

    Oh… and then there would be exceptions.. bugs.. and 😀

    good one :)))

    I would be glad to be the quality consultant then 😉

  7. Heh..perhaps one of them met me in the matrimonial hunt!! Poor rascals, I always imagined such guys would have brainless women flocking to be at their beck and call, rather than be reduced to sitting around discussing their prospects in a cafe! You just made my day! 😀

    ideasmithy..you know you underestimate woman a lot, I do not think people can be so stupid to flock anybody with such stupid thoughts..what I regret though is he is being thought all wrong things and he probably needs to know whats important for him

  8. LOL ! hillarious man…!!

    humans being 2 legged animal are so different from one another, even tho animals behave in much similar ways.. its all the fault of the supposed to be “superior” brain we humans have..

    Dick’s brain is wat i call typical, he is thining wat society and other ppl usually think, really wonder is taht is what he really independantly thinks.. anways, good read and good laugh… 🙂

    Shilps. well we need to be a little different that the other animals isn’t it 🙂
    well I would like to believe he is not typical and more of a specimen :)..may be more people think sensibly.

  9. Hahah! So this is the new South Indian stereotype huh? Move over you curd rice eating darkies!! Hilarious!!

    goodday sunshine..welcome to virtual ramblings..so you think south indains are all curd rice eating darkiess.. or was that the old definition of south indians 🙂

  10. Well I’m a curd drinking not so dark southie…so!!

    firstly I apologize for misunderstanding your comment..well yep I have been called that before..so was on a little defensive 🙂

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