I knew instantly,
The day,
That began
With a lovely dawn,
was not the beginning,
Of a lovely spring,
Rather,
It was an onset
Of the tropical days,
To follow
I knew instantly,
The the first sect,
That began,
With a great philosophy,
Was not the beginning,
Of a lovely thereafter,
Rather
It was an onset
For a number of them
To follow.
I knew instantly,
The first discovery,
That was made,
With a love for peace,
Was not the beginning,
Of a comfortable life,
Rather
It was an onset,
For bloodshed and violence,
To follow
I knew instantly
That the first baby,
That was conceived,
Into this lovely world,
Was not the herald,
Of a flourishing mankind,
Rather
It was an onset,
For the hatred and terror
To follow.
————————————————————————————————————
I have hardly written anything negative, specially when it comes to poetry, basically I am one of those types who believes if I keep avoiding the bad, it will somehow go away, yes you could call me an escapist. Couple of people asked me how come I never wrote about the Mumbai attacks, I did not, and I really did not want to, because I do not want to be that guy who writes about things and then slowly with time forgets the terrible act against mankind.
Today here I have written something, and for the first time, I really want every line of this poem to come out false. And I am sure each one of you want these lines to be untrue, down to each word.
The topic over at Sunday Scribblings this week is “I knew instantly”, and here goes my attempt
On a totally different note, when I was thinking of what the poem should be titled I came up with untrue, but it lead me to a confusion of sorts, why untrue, why not call it False..I am not able to pin point the difference, but untrue speaks a whole lot of other words, then false..doesn’t it?
It sure does 🙂 nice pattern.. its wavy 🙂 I mean the sentence structure 🙂
Well it was certainly a tour de force. Especially the last part.
Somehow you feel things…and I felt how you felt when you wrote it. Thanks for a good poem.
That is an amazing poem. Thank you so much for sharing it.
And yes, Untrue speaks volumes.
I don’t know somehow I remembered mumbai terror when I read it. Sometimes the heart wishes, it would have known many things beforehand! I wish these words to be ‘untrue’ always.
i think most indians would think of recent terror attacks if they read this now. i agreed with neilina.. and we’d all love for this to be untrue, but isn’t it mostly true already?
anyway, i really enjoyed this piece. kudos 🙂
This is a powerful poem. I enjoyed the narrative describing how it came about.
Even w/o reading the lines you wrote in the end, I knew what u were refering to! And u r right, u hardly right anything -ve wrt the poetry 😦
but One can’t help being -ve at all 😦
diffr btw untrue and false.. **sigh** dnt knw.. but untrue sounds better 🙂
Powerful and profound. Excellent work.
sad but true…
great poem and an excellent take on the prompt
peace
chilling poem. excellent writing!
Nicely written , you explain the sentiments each of us feel so well in the poem . How I hope all of it was untrue as well. . .
that was very well written…sad, powerful and hard hitting…
Brilliant piece of poetry. I loved the way the words were woven – it seemed so effortless !! A profound thought in simple words – only those who have attempted poetry know how tough it is to achieve this.
Rambler, congratulations.
Hi- Lyrical and powerful poem that I was compelled to read twice upon landing here. It’s important to write on serious topics. Perfect title (I feel it’s fitting) I’m glad Sun. Scribblings prompted you to write this about atrocities. Most of my poetry is “heavy” and thereby cathartic. I’m very glad you posted this excellent piece.
Trying to write something beyond your ordinary scope can ring false. Or untrue, if you prefer. 😉 That’s why I gave up trying to rhyme a long time ago. ‘Cause I don’t think in rhymes!
Nicely written,… secret called ‘fear’ !!
And well…untrue somehow seems more like arguing with someone that it is not true…fighting with someone to tell the truth…and not false !
Very powerful Rambler Very good
Untrue is loaded with other implications and depths that false is not – so yes, I think you’re right. It’s a powerful and though provoking poem, Rambler, and it’s sometimes those “darker” poems that can speak of and carry the greatest depth in terms of a message to mankind. It’s very good.
lovely!!!
great work i must say. n i loved it no doubt n i do pray every lines of it comes out to be false.
i loved the last 2 stanzas a lot 🙂
I was in Spain when the attacks happened and thought of you every day… powerful poem my friend, that speaks to so much that is true…