If it, were a sport.

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The beautiful white patterns,

Your long handed brush

Strokes onto this open blue sky

Would they be “them”

If it, were a sport?


The twinkles of burning passion,

Reminiscent of the intimacy,

From the times spent with you,

Would they be “them”

If it, were a sport?


The gifts of laughter, he brings us

With his own cleverly hidden smiles,

Moments of pure bliss,

Would they be “them”

If it, were a sport?


The beautiful patterns,

Passions and intimacy,

Laughters and smiles,

Would they be “them”

If life, were a sport?

———————————————————————————————-

I must admit this is one of the poems, which I felt like tearing up once I wrote it. Unfortunately MS word does not allow one to tear sheet, wouldn’t I love that feature, Bill are you listening?.

Anyways Sunday Scribblings this time around has given us “sports” and it happens to be 150th prompt there, I feel kind of stupid with my contribution to the prompt though, I had a lot of thoughts on the idea behind the poem, somehow I was not able to express it. Guys I would really appreciate if you can just write a brief note as to what this poem conveyed to you, may be some day I will do a “theory of pursuit” post on this one, and my idea about why life should not be a sport.

On a totally different note, if you guys have seen “What women want”, I liked one commercial for Nike the two lead actors work on in that movie. That line has been in my head since the time I saw the movie when I was in college, here it goes for “Nike, no games, just sport”. I don’t know if Nike ever used this catch line, If I were to head Nike, I would surely use this one.

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16 responses »

  1. Ah this seems like a confusion to me.. somehow..

    The beautiful white patterns,
    Your long handed brush
    Strokes onto this open blue sky

    This seems so beautiful..

    Is this the first rush of love ? I wish you continued this thought completely to the end.. somehow seems incomplete.. may be it is not.. erm

    The twinkles of burning passion,
    Reminiscent of the intimacy,
    From the times spent with you,

    Loved the expression ” twinkles of burning passion” frankly felt envious that I ddint coin this earlier.. erm why is this in past tense? does that mean she is not near you now..

    The gifts of laughter, he brings us
    With his own cleverly hidden smiles,
    Moments of pure bliss,

    This about the cute little kiddo you made between you both ?

    The last stanza sews all of these together.. atleast.. tries to..

    this seems like 3 beautiful poems started and lost their way somewhere.. but the expressions.. r just so beautiful!

  2. Fortunate that you can’t tear a word doc. This is an abstract poem that hardly needs anything but reading and going with the words. The phrasing is vivid and lets me hear things that resonate with me. nice work.

  3. You got me thinking there hehe .. so my 2 cents? I don’t think life ‘could’ be a sport .. you don’t get a chance to practice before you start playing it.. by the time you realize, you are already living it, in the midst of it, you can only continue playing it.. you can’t stop, take a break to plan, practice, strategize.. it ‘could’ be a game.. and why? that, i have yet to figure out…

    so, a game – may be, a sport – no 🙂

  4. I am not the best at translating poetry, but since you’ve asked…
    to me it represents making love . Although, durning menopause… many things represent that to me!
    I think it is lovely no matter what you were implying!

  5. The first two paras were taking me towards the love relationship but the third para especially the lines, “The gifts of laughter, he brings us…With his own cleverly hidden smiles” divereted me from humanly relationships to relationship with God…..whatever it is, am thinking we can’t make any relationship as sport. And yes, am hating this idea of calling it even sport! For me relationship is pious and not bounded, even no boundness in its name.

  6. There is some beautiful imagery in this poem Rambler, and beautiful sentiments too – I understand the link to sport equating life and the question that surrounds it, but what threw me was “them” – at one level I get what you’re saying, doing, but at another I’m not sure if your meaning comes through clearly enough. I would’t bin this one or tear it up – there is some truly beautiful stuff in here, perhaps just look it over again and be clear in your own mind what you’re wanting to say.

    As for the Nike slogan – well, my hesitation would be that it confines Nike solely to sport – whereas the Nike brand encompasses a whole lifestyle, not just sport! 🙂

  7. I’ve come back and read this several times… letting it sink in.

    I for one, am for letting things be. When words get written down, they take on a life of their own. If we switch them to quickly, or toss them aside, we miss their initial message. There is a lot here… it speaks to me of many levels, some subtle, some blatant. It speaks to me. My favorite lines…

    Your long handed brush
    Strokes onto this open blue sky

    I like it Rambler.

  8. That first stanza is lovely, delicate and ethereal. Your poem makes me think of art first. Perhaps “sport” separates people, those who play and those who do not? Maybe that’s the “them” — the spectator, the outsider? Take a look at the Greek sculpture of Nike, all inspiration, much more than a slogan. That might help you dig a little deeper into the poem. I agree with others. Don’t toss this one.

  9. Meena..some day when I am in the right frame of mind, I would like to explain what I wrote here

    Thanks Tumblewords

    suma..definitely not a game..i wouldn’t say it is a sport either

    snow..glad this made you think..

    DC..I think I will..but not as a poem but as a post

    lucy..an interesting look

    BM.. a great idea

    Neilina..now I have a feeling, I can’t even think when it comes to relationships

    Thanks Marja

    Vanilla thanks for your suggestions

    Thanks Sameera

    Thanks Lea, for coming back to this ..I know poems can be a little concealing…so its good to know people take efforts to go through silly stuff I write

    BB..thank you so much for your comment..you got very close to what I wanted to say..and had in my mind

  10. Pingback: Sporty strokes « Virtual Ramblings

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