I cannot ignore.

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It pains me to see parents suffer. I might have had numerable fights/arguments with mine, and I might snub my arguments as something which is part of every parent child relationship, but I would like to believe I have never taken advantage of them in a way I shouldn’t, nor I have ever respected them less.  I loathe people who knowingly/unknowingly take advantage of their parents, at an age where they need to be supported by the children, they end up supporting the children and all their unplanned and idiotic moves.

I am yet to be convinced that worldly matters do not matter. Money does matter, because we cannot survive without money. When we reach a stage where our income stops, i.e we retire, our expenditure does not stop, however our income does. When most of the retired people leave out of their savings, it becomes extremely important for them to manage their assets, and the kids even more important to make sure they help their parents by adding to their assets and not taking them away.

I know no one really plans financial disasters, but  I guess somewhere people should draw the line and say, no I can’t take any more from my parents and move on, because if god forbids the adventure fails, then the kids have a way of surviving, but think of the retired parents, who do not have an income, and if the savings are lost, what should they do?.

I wanted to blame the parents, for not thinking enough before helping their kids, for not securing their future. But I guess parenthood does that to people, when your kids ask for something, you would try your level best to provide that to them, however old you get, the idea of being a provider never goes away.

I came to know about a news which I could have totally responded with something like “I told you so”, because I kind of suspected that. Unfortunately, I felt really sad for all the people involved, both the parents and the kid. I knew I could not do anything, I could have never stopped the son from taking the risk, nor his parents from letting him. It just pains to know the consequence, and specially the future of his parents. I know they wouldn’t show their sadness, nor would he accept his mistake.

The sad part is the ignorance that is expected out of me, the next time I meet the son or the parents, because its none of my business, and its their choice. Sadly I cannot ignore, I simply cannot ignore.

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13 responses »

  1. Sounds familiar to me. Someone in my family is just_like_this. I think Indian parents are more susceptible to this behavior compared to their Western counterparts. Probably they set these expectations where the kid thinks that it’s ok to ask your parents. Very sad.

    • Ruhi..I am really not against the idea of being able to ask parents for help, but somewhere we need to understand finance is very tricky, specially when it comes to retired people, and every step needs to be thought so much about. You know what I think you are right, this is not something which is very common in the west

  2. Is this who I think it is? I thought that person is done with the risk taking and was “on the way” to getting settled.. It pains me to see that the issue has gone bad..

    • I think you got it right..I think you got the person right..Well lets just say its kind of hanging right now, and even though I kind of expected such a thing, I really wished it does not happen

  3. I’ve seen parents sacrificing and thinking twice before spending anything for their personal pleasure and when the child grows up, its too late to enjoy.

    i really feel bad for teh family, because i know many like that…

    this is so sad.

  4. this is one topic that i can’t shut up on. and sadly, it’s more common in India. i don’t understand, how the kids don’t realize what they’re doing! :S

    • snow, it isnt easy, when kids of ambitions and aspirations, one really does not really think what if it tanks..they shouldn’t either, but I think when it comes to finances we should have our plan B to Z not just Plan A

  5. If I were you, I’d avoid meeting such people as long as I can. After a while the emotions subside and you are more in control. Sometimes running away is a better solution than standing and facing the situation.

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