Inner Demons


Over time we tend to develop image of ourselves, things we want to be, things we are, and somewhere the illusions seems to merge the boundaries between them, and we tend to imagine we are a lot of things, which we are not actually.

Life too kind of encourages us by giving us lesser and lesser situations where we can really put into effect our dreamy self, and lets us continue to be in the illusion, letting us feel happy of what we think we are.

Unfortunately at times when it questions us with serious challenges, thats when you discover the hidden demons within you, the ones which come out and surprise you with their existence. I think its not their existence that surprised me, its how I have been ignorant and been hiding behind who I want to be, rather than be who I am, is what baffled me.

Its sad to see myself doubting every single thing, not trusting people, feeling possessive, everything I thought I wasnt.

P.S..Thanks Saumya for spotting the right demon :)…it does not help when you write something after working with evlogd[aemon] all day


14 responses »

  1. Sense of Deja Vu. I am reading what I am thinking from long time. I have seen my self image crumbling infront of me. And, I have done things and I have hurt people by saying things which I thought I could never say.

    It has made me feel that I am just a common man, I am just a mediocre person. This realization hit me hard, but life never gives other chance and probably its rare that we could make amendments.

    • Kabir..I know exactly what you are saying..its not a pretty sight when your own image crumbles in front of you. The sense of mediocre self is worse then seeing your own death

  2. Are you doing a “Sach Ka Samna” with yourself 😉 You always seem to confront demons which I am aware of but refuse to acknowledge. On a lighter note rambler, get out of that techie self and refer to a demon as a demon and not a daemon 😉

  3. now I am confused. Is this acceptance, acknowledgement or realization ? and how do we deal with them.

    on a different note ; you have been tagged and you better take it up. 😛

    • would really help if you would let me know when you find answer to the question of yours..because I am not able do that myself.

      and thanks for the sure will do it 🙂

  4. I guess accepting it is half the battle…
    I want to explore the demons but the illsuion is so safe and comforting…

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