Category Archives: Questions N Answers

Should I call this a crisis?


I am back with a retrospect post again. Rambler’s ramblings seem to be incomplete without some rants and retrospect.

Almost 30 is the perfect time for some quarter life crisis, or may be considering my theory that software engineers don’t live past 60, it’s the perfect age for mid-life crisis. It’s the time where we look out for things we want to achieve, look at our life and correct some cobwebs, change our attitude towards us, and life in general.

I don’t know if I can classify my current feeling as one such crisis.

Last couple of months have been good and bad professionally and personally. I have had some joy doing things which I like to do at work. Solving problems which I like, and enjoying the success when I crack some difficult ones. I don’t find it surprising that  I still do enjoy problem solving, however it baffles me that some of my colleagues don’t. On the bad front, I have been having some serious doubts about stagnation at my work front, and questioning myself if my decision to stay on is a good one. On the personal front too, I am enjoying moments of joy from a married life, which includes a lot of things which I cannot pin point to, but in all having a good time.

So, you may wonder where is the crisis..

Well I seem to have this feeling of not being good enough,  feeling inadequate. This self-doubt does exist in every individual in small amounts, but then at one point it starts to affect one’s confidence. I have always tried to make sure this self-doubt doesn’t cross that boundary. Of later there have been numerous instances where it seems to cross it and affect me mentally.

On days when I wake up with an off mood, thinking about all the things which I haven’t done in a manner which I cannot consider good enough; The decisions I have taken, which after a long point of no return,  suddenly start putting doubts in my mind; The conversations what I have had with people who seem to have not been to my standards. Even when I think of things to do in future, the thought of being incapable or error prone feeling which makes me sad and offbeat.

What is it that is making me feel not good enough. Is it the self-doubt?  Is it the fear of judgment? Is it the social peer pressure?

I have always given importance to things which I consider important. They have many times been away from the norm. My choices have had a specific purpose and reason behind them, and I have always been proud of my theories which stand by me in all my thoughts and decisions.

So why this doubt now?.


What do you do?


When you are given a problem, what do you do?.

a. Try to solve the problem to the best of your ability.

b. Try to ignore the problem.

c. Try to listen to the problem, and ask questions to make sure you understand the problem fully.

d. Try to listen to the problem, ask no questions, offer no solution, do all this while not ignoring the problem.


All you engineers out there, if you thought answer is a combination of a & c, you are wrong.

If you don’t agree, ask your wife.

Would you


“My heart is always with those who deal with temptation by giving in to it”
I am just quoting “Ken Follett” whose book “The pillars of the earth” is my latest muse.

When you are face to face with a temptation, would you

a. Avoid the temptation in the first place

b. Give in to it, and get over it

c. Fight the temptation, and hope to defeat it

I guess in most of the situations the answer has been ‘Avoid the temptation’ in my case. Just like any other difficult decisions I need to make, best way to deal with it, is avoiding to make those decisions.

It makes me feel like a spineless wuss, but is effective.

One of the best way to deal with any emotion is to feel it completely and that helps you get over it. The line is one of remains from a book I read long time back. Would you deal with a temptation in that way?, would you give in to it, and get over with it?.

Sounds stupid to me. But I have always been a bad risk taker, or rather non risk taker.

On the other hand, every crime committed by a criminal is the last crime before his liberation, atleast to him. Every temptation given into, might turn out to be the last one before one gets over it.

One cannot deny that, its really fun to give into temptations, be it a bar of chocolates in one’s case, or a huge case filled with notes for others.

What would you be


If I were to give you 100$ today to spend, at the end of the day you check your pockets and find 55$ left, would you be happy that you saved 55$ or sad that you spent 45$?.

If  you were careful enough, may be, you could have saved 60 or 65.

If you were stingy, may be you could have saved 80$

If you were a little less careful, you could have saved like 40$

So with 55$ what would you feel?

I see, I ask


I have always considered myself to be shy and nerdy. I have heard people nickname me bookworm back in highschool, and I tend to believe people percieve me to be shrewd and calculative.

After reading a post which was no way related to me here, few questions popped into my mind.

When I see myself to be shy, did I ever appear to be reclusive?

When I see myself to be nerdy and geeky, did I ever appear to be intriguing to anyone?

I guess, some questions just remain as they should,”questions”.